I laughed a lot when the following email forward was sent to me - it showed the other extreme of the road our society was on.
I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to my friends and colleagues, but it is so difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my attorney yesterday, and on their advice I wish to say the following Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes or an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.
I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted Gregorian calendar year 2011, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.
By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for himself or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.
In short, wishing you a Merry Christmas and a Prosperous New Year .....
I for one, am having no more of this diplomatic non political keep everyone happy attitude (which is a complete about turn for someone like me, years ago I used to be told that I was frustratingly way too diplomatic to survive in this cynical world) which is why I am boldly posting this. Im sure none of my readers know that the guy in the picture below Dwayne Johnson (a.k.a. the Rock, a wrestling superstar who is now a leading Hollywood actor) made the catchphrase "Do you smell what the Rock is cooking?" famous (accompanied by him closing his eyes and taking a deep breath as in the picture to the left)
Wait, whats that you say? You dont appreciate that? Uh oh, exit stage left. Feet, dont fail me now. Btw whatever happened to tolerance?