Summer & SIM's

For the sterotypical Indian male (SIM) the arrival of summertime heralds the (I can almost imagine him rubbing his hands in glee) onset of sleeveless tops for Indian women most prominently of the teens to mid age spectrum (high degree of political correctness being employed to avoid trouble from any women I know reading this and falling in this category). I dont know what the fascincation is all about, its just a few square centimetres of skin being displayed near the shoulder. I mean you probably see most of the armthe rest of the year, for 3 months you get a chance to see it completely. And yet serial ogglers will continue to well oggle while the others might just let an accidental glance linger for that extra second, these 2 categories being the way the stereotypical Indian male is divided into.

Maybe they (the sterotypical Indian male) think they are making up for the cold winter months in which women covered themselves from head to toe with tops, sweaters, stoles and whatnot and not a trace of skin could be seen. Maybe they are just being guys. Maybe they believe that they are only appreciating natures creations and I think it is fair to say that women do the same when it comes to guys.

Which is where the whole 'Hey I think I saw that guy give you a second glance' (a genuine compliment) versus the 'Lets no go there, those idiots are leching like its their last day on earth' (which is when you wish a bus load of policemen get off a bus surround the cheapos and beat them black and blue) discussion crops up. Disclaimer : the following applies to both sexes for the sake of correctness.

Type 1: The shameless of the shameless will openly admit to leching which includes checking out the other persons physical attributes in a negative manner whatever be the time, place or occassion.

Type 2: Then there are the casual lechers who will ordinarily not stoop to such levels but given the right time, place or occassion they wont stop themselves from having a casual glance.

Type 3: The third type is those who genuinely would think now that woman is pretty/attractive/ any-other-adjective-for-a-woman or guy is handsome/cute/ any-other-adjective-for-a-guy. Which doesnt mean they keep staring at every person walking by admiring and appreciating but i believe they would do so in moderation. For some strange reason I tend to compare such people with wine-lovers. Dont ask.

Type 4: Fourthly there are those believe that appreciating/admiring/harmlessly checking out/leching etc for those few seconds or minutes wont make a difference to your life and hence dont bother with the entire effort. Their argument does have some degree of reasoning - after all seeing someone on a bus, train, in a mall, in office or anywhere else for a couple of minutes wont really change your life unless you really believe that you can emulate Bollyowod's heroes who can woo a woman who hates them by whisking them away to some snow capped mountain where they will dance while being under-dressed for the biting cold. (How do these heroes transport them from Bombay to Switzerland and bring them back the moment the song gets over anyways ..... hmmmmmm but I digress)

Edit : Type 5 - Came across a new classification today while chatting with the guys - 'the lighthouse', used to describe a person who will check out someone and strain his/her neck while only looking at that person until they are out of sight (which doesnt necessarily result in out of mind but still....) Usually involves a 360 degree rotation of neck + body, hence the name.

So how does one draw that thin line between whats acceptable and whats not? I really dont know. I guess you will have to ask the stereotypical Indian woman(SIW). Which is one topic I know nothing about.

Summertime

Its only February but the summer sun is making a rather unwelcome early appearance this year. Make that a couple of months too early (this should convince all the non - Al Gore believers...) Im not one for much roaming around Bangalore on weekends - a rather unequal combination of1. bad traffic (on saturdays) and its accompanying pollution (try waiting at any one of our numerous signals where autos refuse to switch off their engines and give out unbelievable amounts of smoke)2.an empty wallet for which the soon to arrive R15 is to blame3.exhaustion (for which weekdays are to blame) and 4.laziness all combine together to push me towards my book collection which is growing faster than I am reading them.

Last sunday however necessity overcame this comfortable combination and I was roaming around town with my brother. The result - my weekend exhaustion has moved to weekday exhaustion and ive got a major pain in my neck due to my rather heavy GP One helmet. And yet I actually enjoyed it.

Come to think of it theres something about the summer that makes people upbeat. School kids are understandably happy as its sports time until they are old enough to (wrongly) realise studies are more important. Parents are happy cause they dont need to get up early and put send their kids to school. Tourist spots see higher revenues. Music artists get to croon/rap/etc etc about their favourite time of the year. I mean think about it, how many songs about the winter have you heard? The only end of the year songs Ive heard are christmas songs. But summertime brings out the best of music artists. The song summertime aptly captures the spririt of the season

In the summertime when the weather is fine

And you can strech right up and touch the sky

Now when the weather is fine

You got women, you got women on your mind

Im gonna drink and drive and see what I can find

Now if her daddy is rich take her out for a meal

And if her daddy is poor just do what you feel ......

The price of education ....

As I stepped out of the rather grand entrance hall into the parking lot and turned back to look at the quaint architecture, it struck me that I could very well be in some century old school in England. As I looked around, I noticed the perfectly manicured and tastefully laid out sprawling garden which even included a mini Stonehenge. Looking at the mini layout of the school, my eyes enviously rested on the 2 basketball courts, 2 tennis courts, swimming pool, football & hockey ground. Some people have all the luck....
Back to waiting in the lobby and my PSP was my saviour as noisy boys roamed the corridors between classes who gave more than a second glance to the rather eye catching helmet of mine (here we go again .....) Everything done, my bro & I were ready to leave the school and head back to town when my brother dopped a bombshell in a matter of a fact way " ....really nice school, well mannered kids. Guess what the fees are? 6 lacs a year" Thats a shade under what you would pay for a 2 year MBA in a pretty good Bschool in India! Not many things can make me speechless. This one most certainly did. Im still in shock. Holy cow!

Safe and sorry ......

The last time I went to the Electronics City office (situated 20 minutes away from Bangalore city) by bike I got stopped by a cop (who to be fair was stopping a lot of bikes) in front of the Madiwala police station. He checked my bike papers and since I dont have the No Objection Certificate (NOC, a document by your local Regional Transport Office that says you are cleared to ride in other states) I had to slip the cop a 100 buck note. In all honesty it was my mistake as I was riding right in front of him despite being warned by my friend that since I have a bike that is registered in Kerala I should avoid riding right in front of them as we are easy meat. Lesson learned the hard way. And I was determined never to make the same mistake again.

So there I was, passing through the same road today morning when I remembered this incident 500 meters before I reached the police station. So I moved to the middle of the road in between buses and cars when from out of nowhere a cop sees me and charges onto the middle of the road and asks me to pull over. Surprised would barely begin to describe what I felt and after the mandatory 'Uncle Cop' role he started taking out his charge booklet. Out came my wallet and I gave him a 50 but he was like 'Only 50 ? it should be 100' but then in a kind gesture he decided to take the 50. Wallet lightened and I was still puzzled as to why he suddenly charged across the road to pull me over.

5 minutes later I stopped at a signal & was checking my rear view mirror when it struck me. The last time I was caught was in front of the police station and I am sure that todays cop wouldve seen me at that time. How did he remember it was me? My more than colourful GP One helmet with an iridium visor & orange DSG gloves, thats how. I am pretty sure I must be a pretty stand out in terms of bike gear (as if a helmet & gloves is sufficient but compare that to other bikers, most of who wear a cheap black helmet without even securing the helmet clasps, and you get the picture) and he wouldve remembered how I had to pay the last time.

So have I learned my lesson & will I go get the NOC from my RTO and come to the Bangalore RTO and pay the state tax ? errrr no. Not only will a lot more plams have to be waxed, a lot of time will also get wasted. Plus that R15 is looking all the more desirable, with a Bangalore registration no issues will arise. Im assuming I wont get caught enough number of times till the R15 is in my garage. So the 2 options in front of me - get a new helmet (been on my mind for a while) and / or find an alternate route that doesnt go through the Madiawala police station to get to office. Time to hit Google Maps.

Weekend Blues

You know that you really need a change when your weekends start painting themselves with that drab scent of monotony. And so it was that we decided to go for a KK concert to be held at IIM-Bangalore last Saturday. His performance was scheduled to start at 18:30 and so we reached their early enough to give us time to check out the campus and the other events. Managed to catch a Punjabi group dance competition complete with a sardar whose clothes were falling off .... I kid you not.

Anyways 18:30 became 19:00 which became 19:30 which became .... We were pretty frustrated by the time KK got on stage at 20:00 but his performance did take away some of the pent up anger.

Fortunately we didn’t stand in line or get into the jam packed enclosed ground. Found a good vantage point at an elevation from where we could see the screen pretty clearly and there wasn’t a constantly-on-the-jump crowd to further get on our nerves. The next 2 hours were pretty enjoyable with KK entertaining us with his hits, special mention to the Summer of 69 song. All good except for the fact that KK kept hopping to the back of the stage to the drummer with his back to the audience while shaking his bum. Dont ask how I noticed! I cant tell you that he's a must watch act as I think his music is a bit soft-ish and I prefer my music to have a tad more rock entwined in it. Like Rock On. But a welcome change it was, now to make plans for this weekend that dont include a movie or a mall.

Oz Open errr Aus Open

It truly was a battle of the titans. One for the ages. Roger Federer against Rafael Nadal for the Australian Open title. It was billed as the final everyone wanted to see and they sure didnt disappoint.

Impossible angles were the norm rather than the exception. Once again it came down to Roger Federer's grace versus Rafael Nadal's never-give-up spirit. One has to give credit where credit is due, Nadal chased down every single ball and had the ability to return more shots (often winners) than any other player I have seen. Phenomenal I think would begin to describe him.

It was only in the 5th set that finally the signs were finally visible. Federer's face started showing those creeping moments of doubt as suddenly every shot of his seemed to be going out. And before he knew it Nadal had a commanding lead and walked away with the title. The commentators mentioned that its probably at a stage now where Nadal is in Federer's head. He beat him on his Rolland Garros. He even went to Wimbledon & beat Federer on his home court. And slowly but surely it appears that the mantle is being passed. From one great to the next, the heralding of the new while gracefully ushering out the old guard. I for one still prefer watching Federer but it is Nadal who is the better player for now.

As a side note, NDTV immediately began flashing the headline Nadal wins 'Oz Open' not realizing that the Oz Open would equate to the New Zealand Open. Morons.

It wasnt me !

Stumbled upon a BBC discussion on the economic crisis yesterday which had among its panelists the head of AIG (who a year back in a discussion on the same topic said there was no reason to worry), an expert nicknamed 'Dr Doom' because he predicted the housing crash among other things, the head of Guyana and the Swiss finance minister and a couple of others (am a bit hazy on the exact backgrounds of everyone but this is it rather more than less). Some of the rather eye-opening moments of the discussion included

- the AIG guy claiming that you cannot expect the board of a company to know what is happening within the same company

- some lady who kept claiming that it was the system that was at fault and what was done was in good faith and people didn’t know what the ramifications of their actions on the entire system would be

- a guy from the audience who mentioned that companies are paying out huge bonuses to their top management when they should be rewarded on their long term performance rather than the short term gains they bring which will have a negative impact on the company in the long run

- the Guyana Premier who said that had it been a developing nation that had made the same mistakes, we would all be sitting listening to a lot of preaching which isn’t happening now cause it is the developed world which is at fault (which received applause)
- the AIG guy who claimed the $85 billion dollar bailout for AIG wasn’t really for AIG but was a bailout for the entire system

Sometimes the bullshit was so evident I felt bad for the people doling it out - either they really believed what they were saying or that they knew that they had to keep maintaining the same stand lest they (!horror of horrors!) admit that they were wrong and should be accountable. Its really sad when I see the number of people being laid off each week and when the people who can make a difference hold their hands up in indifference and claim its not their fault.

193 to go

"Expectation is the mother of disappointment". So goes my line of thinking. Here's why.

For years I was one of the countless who were led to believe that a movie is as great as its trailer. But with age came the realisation that movie trailers have all the pivotal scenes & the best dialogues. All that’s left is the climax, which isn’t too difficult to guess these days.

Nicholas Cage's Snake Eyes fits the bill rather clearly. The movie had nothing to offer and was such a big disappointment. Deep Blue Sea ranks a close second. Oceans 13 which I watched recently was surprisingly quite a flop in this respect as well.

Which is where the 200 movies that I recently got my hands on come in. I must have heard of a grand total of 10 of them. Which means 195 movies with absolutely no scope for disappointment.

City of God is one of the 195. And boy was it one heck of a movie. Really fascinating movie that was made all the more special by the fact that its based on a true story. Wow there is so much of this world that we dont know or can barely begin to fathom. Another Aussie movie - Gone is part of this movie brigade. The movie has 3 unknown lead characters and an insignificant support cast along with the Australian outback. And yet it had me gripped.

So here's my oath for the year 2009. No more trailers. As an extension - no judging a music album on the songs that have been released on radio/VH1. Only then will I give myself the freedom to not get disappointed. And in times like these we really could do with this freedom.

Not quite the Indian Idol

So there we were, having breakfast at office when a person joined the group of people sitting at our table and proceeded to take out his cellphone and play some crazy Punjabi song (as far as I could make out) at full volume. Our company culture is such that a group of people laughing loudly during meal time find themselves at the receiving end of disapproving glances (We would know since we are almost always the culprits). So one can imagine the looks of horror etched on peoples faces when they realised what was happening. Not only that, the hero decided to start singing along loudly as well. Cue instantaneous silence and dropped jaws all across. Hearing a guy sing "Come be my boyfriend" in office first thing in the morning is not a pleasant experience by any measure. Never before have we gulped down our sandwiches at that speed. Absolutely amazing.

We spotted him later on for lunch as well. As my friend said, "He is drinking his banana shake like he is sipping beer". Nuff said !

Camel Lunch

A couple of weeks back I my 1st Camel Lunch of 2009. 'A what?' you might ask. Simply put, a Camel Lunch is a lunch in which you end up eating so much that you actually are stuffed for the next 24 hours. It is possible.......

In todays overly-weight conscious world, enjoying a good meal is becoming a rarity. How often have you seen a person just give in to the temptation of really good meal? For me I usually have 2 Camel Lunch's a year - for Christmas & Easter. On those 2 days, it takes a lot of effort for me to climb the steps to my bedroom cause I am so stuffed. The best part of a Camel Lunch - the simply divine post lunch sleep which can extend to 4+ hours.

This time my Camel Lunch happened cause I had gone for a lunch buffet to a restaurant in Banglore. To say that I loved the food would be a gross understatement. I was so full after eating that I said to myself - no desserts. 5 minutes later I decided to go check the dessert section. Big mistake - pastries, jelly, 3 flavours of ice cream, a chocolate fountain to soak brownies/cake pieces, gulab jamuns and something else were just too tempting. My mouth waters at the very thought of them today. Sufficient to say I went for more than a couple of rounds of dessert.

And I could barely touch food for the next 1 1/2 days. It is good to break down our self imposed walls once in a while. Oh yeah, one last thing - burp !

Faster, higher, stronger ! errrrr not exactly....

There's something about sports that brings out the best in (well, most) of us. No longer can man battle man with bare fists & weapons, trying to break both will & bone until one finally emerges victorious like in the old days(Scenes from Russel Crowe's Gladiator spring to mind). So we have over the decades decided to engage in more civilised combat on the sporting field. Great rivalries have played out on tennis courts over the last few decades, the most recent being Rafael Nadal & Roger Federer. Storybook stuff. Australia & England battling over the Ashes. You get the drift.

The challenges that inspire the best out of our sporting champions is what captures our attention. When Australia batting first made the highest one day score people were like 'wow, South Africa is going to be embarrassed tonight'. And then SA go ahead and rewrite the history books by surpassing the total in a brilliant effort. Scripting the impossible is what makes sports so fascinating.

So what in the world are we doing going bowling? We end up spending time & money by running and hurling a ball down a polished floor to try and knock down stationary pins. Well you might argue that cricket is the same, we are after all trying to knock down 3 stumps and/or the bails. But there is the small matter of a batsman who is ready to smash the ball and your ego straight out the park, standing between you and the stumps. So what’s the challenge in bowling ? We dont have different weather conditions to play in. We dont have different surfaces to play on. We dont have an opponent to negate our moves, whoever your opponent is doesnt make a difference to your next attempt. So why am I spotted in bowling alleys? Oh, I just enjoy sitting back and watching my friends try their hand at it while they go through myriad emotions. Trust me thats much more enjoyable.

Yes, President !

As George Double Yah Bush's terms winds down, BBC decided to remind all of us how the President has tickled our funny bone over the years. The contents below are from the BBC link ( http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/7809160.stm)

ON HIMSELF
"They misunderestimated me."Bentonville, Arkansas, 6 November, 2000
''I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe - I believe what I believe is right." Rome, 22 July, 2001
"There's an old saying in Tennessee - I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee - that says, fool me once, shame on... shame on you. Fool me - you can't get fooled again."Nashville, Tennessee, 17 September, 2002
"There's no question that the minute I got elected, the storm clouds on the horizon were getting nearly directly overhead."Washington DC, 11 May, 2001
"I want to thank my friend, Senator Bill Frist, for joining us today. He married a Texas girl, I want you to know. Karyn is with us. A West Texas girl, just like me."Nashville, Tennessee, 27 May, 2004

FOREIGN AFFAIRS
"For a century and a half now, America and Japan have formed one of the great and enduring alliances of modern times."Tokyo, 18 February, 2002
"The war on terror involves Saddam Hussein because of the nature of Saddam Hussein, the history of Saddam Hussein, and his willingness to terrorise himself."Grand Rapids, Michigan, 29 January, 2003
"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." Washington DC, 5 August, 2004
"I think war is a dangerous place."Washington DC, 7 May, 2003
"The ambassador and the general were briefing me on the - the vast majority of Iraqis want to live in a peaceful, free world. And we will find these people and we will bring them to justice."Washington DC, 27 October, 2003
"Free societies are hopeful societies. And free societies will be allies against these hateful few who have no conscience, who kill at the whim of a hat."Washington DC, 17 September, 2004
"You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror."CBS News, Washington DC, 6 September, 2006

EDUCATION
"Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?"Florence, South Carolina, 11 January, 2000
"Reading is the basics for all learning."Reston, Virginia, 28 March, 2000
"As governor of Texas, I have set high standards for our public schools, and I have met those standards."CNN, 30 August, 2000
"You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.''Townsend, Tennessee, 21 February, 2001

ECONOMICS
"I understand small business growth. I was one."New York Daily News, 19 February, 2000
"It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it."Reuters, 5 May, 2000
"I do remain confident in Linda. She'll make a fine Labour Secretary. From what I've read in the press accounts, she's perfectly qualified."Austin, Texas, 8 January, 2001
"First, let me make it very clear, poor people aren't necessarily killers. Just because you happen to be not rich doesn't mean you're willing to kill."Washington DC, 19 May, 2003

HEALTHCARE
"I don't think we need to be subliminable about the differences between our views on prescription drugs."Orlando, Florida, 12 September, 2000
"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB/GYN's aren't able to practice their love with women all across the country."Poplar Bluff, Missouri, 6 September, 2004

TECHNOLOGY
"Will the highways on the internet become more few?"Concord, New Hampshire, 29 January, 2000
"It would be a mistake for the United States Senate to allow any kind of human cloning to come out of that chamber."Washington DC, 10 April, 2002
"Information is moving. You know, nightly news is one way, of course, but it's also moving through the blogosphere and through the Internets."Washington DC, 2 May, 2007

OUT OF LEFT FIELD
"I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully."Saginaw, Michigan, 29 September, 2000
"Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream."LaCrosse, Wisconsin, 18 October, 2000
"Those who enter the country illegally violate the law."Tucson, Arizona, 28 November, 2005
"That's George Washington, the first president, of course. The interesting thing about him is that I read three - three or four books about him last year. Isn't that interesting?"Speaking to reporter Kai Diekmann, Washington DC, 5 May, 2006

ON GOVERNING
"I have a different vision of leadership. A leadership is someone who brings people together."Bartlett, Tennessee, 18 August, 2000
"I'm the decider, and I decide what is best."Washington DC, 18 April, 2006
"And truth of the matter is, a lot of reports in Washington are never read by anybody. To show you how important this one is, I read it, and [Tony Blair] read it."On the publication of the Baker-Hamilton Report, Washington DC, 7 December, 2006
"All I can tell you is when the governor calls, I answer his phone."San Diego, California, 25 October, 2007
"I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office."Washington DC, 12 May, 2008

New Age Thoughts For A Day

For years I've read about how ones destiny is in their own hands & how you script your future and all that mumbo jumbo. Turns out it isnt quite true these days. People catching a train from Mumbai's most crowded station/dining in 2 of Mumbai's top flight hotels had their futures rewritten thanks to a handful of madmen from Pakistan. Thousands of people watched the once esteemed Wall Street collapse in a jiffy & wipe out their money in the process. Madoff and his Ponzi scheme have risen from obscurity to hog the headlines of papers across the world. What makes this different is that a number of charities had invested their money in Madoff & now they have to shut down. Manufacturing across the world is taking a massive hit (GM isn’t the beginning & end of America's economy). Layoffs & halting of production have unfortunately become the norm rather than the exception. All of which has had a trickle down effect on the Indian economy.

But what has really got us in India shaken is the whole Satyam fiasco that’s unfolded in the last 24 hours. A 7000 crore fraud that’s grown out of hand in the last few years and auditors PricewaterhouseCoopers (PwC) didnt know anything about it? To quote Dutch from SHIELD 'You have got to be shitting me!' The life & dreams of 53,000 Satyam employees seems to amount to nothing now does it. I guess its time we started from scratch. Tell school kids 'Boys & girls, when you finish your education you may not have a job because a lot of other people screwed up'. Maybe its time kids start reading the truth.

I think I'll start with these -

"Success is 99% perspiration & 1% inspiration & not having a CEO who will fcuk your company"
"A success a day & an honest auditor keeps bankruptcy away"

Corporate culture through the eyes of Scott Adams

For all those HR people who advocate working to prove that you can rise to a challenge

You know the type - the ones who talk about modern challenges & how everyone has to work harder now that its recession time. About how we should continue to strive forward to accept new challenges & cross new boundaries. While working for the same pay......

Too much customer friendliness

We all agree that the customer is king. But what happens when you take it to extremes ?

The BOSS

The BOSS

Many of us have often encountered people in a much better position than ourselves, earning in many multiples of our salary while at the same time knowing absolutely nothing at all. Its not all bad though, conversations on how he managed to reach that position & stay there without the people above him realising he's an idiot are extremely enjoyable & much more fun than discussing the weather.

IT life

My favourite! This truly does capture the life of a guy in India's IT industry. We slog for days (includes weekends & overtime for which we do not get paid) & at the end of it the guys onsite/clients say 'Oh thats not required' ......

Speed vs Dionysia

Its January and Im missing the last leg of the glorious TAPMI life. For those not in the know, placements (which is what everyone does an MBA for, irrespective of how much the authorities try to convince you otherwise) in TAPMI happen in mid-December. What follows is probably the best 3 months ever - as the workload drops to a fraction of its original sky high levels & people just stop giving a shit about assignments & presentations. Which is also why Speed (our annual inter sectional & extremely hotly contested sports event) & Dionysia (our annual inter sectional theatre event) come up in Jan - Feb. Ive been part of both during my time in TAPMI and its difficult to decide which of the two was more fun.

One fond memory that I will always carry of Speed was when we were in PGP I. Our seniors was playing against each other in the finals & one team was 2 - 0 out of 5 sets. We had some yoga class to attend and throughout the yoga session we could hear wild cheering over the sound of beating drums (trust me Im not making this up) It was like being in the middle of a rock concert & not being able to see the band on stage. An hour later we were done & rushed to the court to find the team had staged an incredibly comeback, winning the next 3 sets to eventually win 3-2. Watching them play with so much heart gave us all goosebumps & was truly worthy of a movie.

Our matches used to happen early morning before class and in the evenings (sunlight permitting) I recall playing in the football match in the first year and the whole team suddenly realising that we had less than 15 minutes before class started. We all rushed back to the hostel & passed the girls walking to college telling us that we would never be able to make it in time. Needless to say all 11 of us were in class before the girls thanks to the miracles of soapless baths,crumpled clothes,bikes & deodrants. The fact that we could barely climb the stairs to reach class was another matter .....

Dionysia has provided a truckload of memories as well. As the (co) director, I remember hiding behind the desk on stage with the script in hand to prompt the team in case anyone forgot their lines. I swear I went crazy as the team kept jumping 2 pages forward, then 1 page back then 3 pages ahead. Of course the climax was quite unforgettable with our leading lady who was supposed to die from a bullet shot, kept waiting for the bullet and eventually dropped dead only for the bullet sound to echo through the hall after she fell. Fortunately our hero's extremely dramatic fall from a bullet a minute later got the audience back to the serious stuff. We used a scene from an episode of SHIELD (I knew watching all those episodes would eventually come handy) where a guy sitting on a chair gets shot & the impact of the bullet causes him to violently fall back with the chair giving additonal effect. Perfect timing & a very loud chairfall caused the audience to think our actor had actually hurt himself. Brilliant.

We really scratched our heads in the second year to find a play/movie to adapt (as mentioned elsewhere on the blog). Fortunately this time we had a much bigger stage to work on which gave us a lot of creative freedom. Replicating the train scene was proving to be a quite a headache until I hit upon the idea of switching off all the lights except a spotlight & having our actors in the middle with a lot of other guys walking up & down in the background with the sound of a trains engine. Being shorthanded with regards to the support team, I was worried about pulling off the play but a grand total of 2 of us managed to synchronise it perfectly. When we came to the scene I could hear the audience raise its voice in puzzlement but in a couple of seconds they burst out into appreciative applause. We may have ended up being the second best team on that night but that applause for that one scene was worth all the effort we had put in.

So where am I with regards to my decision on which was better ? To be honest they are like chalk and cheese. Yin & yang. Beavis & Butthead. Ive realised I might as well sit back & relish the memories. A tie is what I declare !

Ready, aim , hurl that shoe !

For years the humble shoe has been just that - a shoe. You polish your formal pair(s) and head to work. You keep your sneakers a light shade of brown to show that the shoe has been run in. A total of 3 pairs does it for most guys I guess. Unlike women who need a pair for each shade of dress / different colour combination that they have but thats another story in itself. And the shoe would've been destined to stay at that level of unimportance for the years to come had it not been for the actions of one Munthadar al-Zeidi, an Iraqi journalist.

After his courageous shoe flinging incident he has become something of a celebrity across the world. Suddenly everyones inbox was filled with
1. a video of the incident which unfortunately missed beloved Bush
2. a game which allows you to throw shoes at Bush popping up behind a podium

I even read somewhere that a (Egyptian?) dad has offered the hand of his daughter in marriage to Mr Munthadar al-Zeidi because of his bravery. Here with the downturn in the economy & the uncertainty thats prevailing across the Indian IT sector, guys from the IT industry are just not getting marriage proposals. However his bravery has come at a price, his brother has been quoted as saying that he is missing a tooth & has cigarette burn marks on his ear (according to the Associated Press). Ouch. But I guess in the years to come, this clip will be replayed again and again and people will look back with a smile and say, now there was a guy with balls. Honestly not many have the guts to stand up to the American president. Tony Blair is one name that springs to mind with an alarming speed. The French stood up to them some years back & Americans wanted to ban french fries ..... Munthadar al-Zeidi, may you come out of this safe, my prayers are with you. Even if your actions were an extreme case of exercising your right to freedom of speech & you were wrong in hurling that shoe with great force (at the expense of precision), you have ended up making the world think. And for this I thank you.

The ultimate guy device !

Disclaimer : By posting this image, in no way do I suggest that I recommend the development of such a life saving device (for half the worlds population - the guy half) nor do I subscribe to this line of thinking.

A little too much ?

We are in an age of advanced political correctness which, although is right in its own way, does tend to make life a bit complicated as seen by the contents of this New Year greeting I received today. Enjoy !

Dear All,
I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to my friends and colleagues, but it is so difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my attorney yesterday, and on their advice I wish to say the following

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted Gregorian calendar year 2009, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for himself or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

In short, wishing you a Merry Christmas and a Prosperous New Year.

Dylan sang it best

There are some things in life you love to cling on to. Old cards from friends long forgotten. Old magazines which you’ve read & re-read so many times youre familiar with the contents each time you flip through it. That old t-shirt that you’ve grown up in but steadfastly refuse to throw away. And the belief that youre young, irrespective of the number of New Year eve parties that you’ve witnessed.

Each time I catch up with my school friends who I grew up with, we end up recalling the good old days and share a very good laugh. And we end up thinking how long back that was. Its not easy realising that lady time is taking us along with her day by day while we vehemently refuse to let go of our notions of being forever young(a Dylan classic). Sitting in the rather popular Cocoa Tree in Cochin is often a surprisingly honest slap on the face. Not only do we get to witness kids (Defn kid - anyone younger than me) with jeans ready to fall with the next breeze while wearing t-shirts 3 sizes larger than their actual size, but we also get to learn whats happening & whats not. Last week I saw 5 guys troop in there sporting beards identical to mine. Time to change my style then, cant be seen as one of their brigade ..... Each one of them whips out a mobile phone at all possible times for no discernible reason and I could go on and on but you get the point - they seem to be really different from how we were when we were their age(which is not a great gap in itself).

Now I realise what our parents must be feeling when they look at us & think 30 years ago life was never like this & wonder how to deal with us. And here I'm talking about kids 3 or more years younger than us. Wow the next generation of kids is going to have one bunch of confused parents (read - us). Gulp ! As Dylan sang - the times, they are a changing .....

Adios 2008

Its that time of the year again when I look at the little pop up at the bottom right corner of my screen & realise that yet another year has passed by in the blink of an eye. Of course just about everybody who thinks that their writing matters (journalists, bloggers, diary writers) will be sitting down penning their thoughts on the year's events both on a personal as well as general front. Which reminds me its back to my days of diary writing from tomorrow onwards. Party planning is going on in full swing everywhere I look. Beverage companies (cant call them alcohol manufacturers now can I?) sure must love December. Relatedly my home state of Kerala has just been in the news a couple of days back for witnessing record sales of booze despite the slowdown in its IT sector, the not positive stock market & increasing number of unemployed NRIs in the gulf. God bless Mallus. Anyways today calls for some introspection time which is probably the only thing good about New Years eve.

Am looking forward to settling down in work & having as much fun, if not more. Marriage age is setting in for both my childhood friends & TAPMI brethren, a couple of weddings are happening in Feb. Looking forward to more in the coming months. The R15 which I blogged about earlier is as tempting as it ever was, crappy after sales service included. Now to build my bank balance towards its high asking price. Thing is by the time I'll be able to afford it Bajaj wouldve come out with newer & better bikes & I'll be back to square one. Hopefully I finally get off my lazy butt & start writing my one-shot-at-writing-glory novel. Hopefully I dont have to upgrade my wardrobe to account for my increasing waistline. Hopefully I get my hands on all the eipsodes of Seinfeld which I'm really loving these days.

Its been a royal mixed bag in the last 364 days, hope the next year is as topsy turvy as this one. What’s life without a little uncertainty anyways ?